Enough is enough!

Dear diary,

I have never had to identify as black. I've always lived amongst other black people and so I never needed to consciously identify my race. Chimamanda and I agree on that.

Because of the books I read and shows I watch, I've gotten used to seeing white people everywhere and seeing their lifestyle as one to be emulated. That has not necessarily changed. But with this new wave of racism, I've had to check myself too. I haven't been exempted from racism, but I haven't had to live with the constant fear that black people in the West have become used to.

And so I've become distant and apathetic. Not because I don't care, but because I haven't been personally affected.  I've been experiencing my own special form privilege and I know there are other people out there like me.  For people like me, we need to do just as much research and studying as any other white person. The reason why racism has gone on for so long is IGNORANCE. On the part of white people AND black people. We all owe our brothers and sisters that have been discriminated all over the world, the decency of being informed. Enough is enough!

And to all the black people out there that have lived in constant fear of being looked down on, passed over, discriminated, shot, arrested or killed because of your skin colour, I'm sorry for my ignorance. And I'm sorry you've had to live in a world that decides you're a threat because of your skin colour. Being black does NOT make you a threat. Being black does NOT mean you can't run. Being black does NOT mean you don't have rights. Black, brown, white.. You're a HUMAN. And last time I checked, that guaranteed you some rights.

Black people carry a long, heavy history. And I'm learning to be proud of that. When I look at all the people who are standing up and speaking up against racism now, when I see the way black people have taken a stand, I feel proud. We're done being pushed around and being looked down on. We should be judged and treated based on our qualifications and character. And even then, we should be treated with human decency. If everyone could start from there, racism would be flushed out.

I've heard that sometimes when people post "Black lives matter", some people  respond with "All lives matter". And my question is, if we're aware that ALL lives matter, why aren't ALL people treated decently and with regard to their lives? All lives matter, but until black lives matter as much as white ones, that statement will never be true.

Haven said all this, all white people are not racist. I've seen lots of white people speaking up now. As black people, we shouldn't let ourselves grow up hostile towards white people. We shouldn't judge a whole race based on the actions of a few. That's the same thing that has been done to us for ages. I choose to be bigger.

The world is a crazy place to live in right now. Rape. Racism. COVID-19. And only one of these diseases started its crazy spread this year.  I can't control everyone else. I can't shut down other peoples opinions or beliefs. But I can modify my own. I can fight for equality. I can speak up. I can support my black brothers and sisters. I can spread awareness. I can choose not to be so familiar with stories of racism that I become apathetic. I can choose be a proud, hardworking black female. I can choose to love people regardless of race. What have you decided to change?

I heard something really amazing the beginning of this week. "God isn't colour blind". God didn't accidentally make us different colours. He wanted diversity. Because if a group of people that are exactly the same are united, there isn't much to it. But when people from different cultures, backgrounds, mindsets, beliefs, and yes, races, are united, there is true beauty. I choose to contribute to that picture of "true beauty."

Stay blessed. God bless.

Dera