Cancel culture and grace...

Hey everyone,

Don't know about you, but this week was exhausting. Not necessarily mentally seeing as I just came back from a school break. But physically, definitely. I feel a bit tired emotionally though, can't even really begin to explain that. I've been thinking a lot about the election going on in the US and what my preferences are and why those are my preferences. Such dissection is really important to me.

This week.. I've been thinking a lot about grace. The grace that has been extended to me and the grace I want to extend to others. I am so glad only God knows me fully and that He is willing to love me despite all that He knows. But nowadays I feel a stronger need to extend that same grace to others. We're living in a time of cancel culture. Everyone is on fire to be an advocate, which isn't a bad thing. But that advocacy has also created a culture of downright meanness and hypocrisy. I shall elaborate... Nowadays, people are quick to say they are not racist before exploring their racist tendencies. It's like people know racism is bad (which is great!) and they don't want to be cancelled and so they say they aren't racist. But they never actually take the time to check themselves and figure out whether they do have those tendencies. It's so much easier to say you are something than to actually be it. Trust me, I know. I feel like we fear that self-exploration because we might find out things about ourselves that we are really scared of. But it's so important. You can never change or get better if you never acknowledge that there is room for improvement.

But to the original topic of grace... I think we find it so easy to shut people down for having different opinions. To me, that's what cancel culture is all about. One 'wrong' statement. One 'wrong' belief. One 'wrong' decision. And you're cancelled! Just like that. All those people that loved you, hate you and can't stand you. It's so shocking to me how quickly people can isolate someone once they believe something different. I'll admit, some people have opinions that 'I' consider wrong. But I made a conscious decision sometime around September to show people grace. Cause nobody likes being attacked. Attacking people doesn't create room for them to grow, understand your point of view and eventually, if it's necessary, change. Attacking people alienates them. I know there's something powerful about being in the majority, being in a group where your opinions are seen as correct. And in such situations, I can imagine it's hard for you to calm down and give the unpopular opinion holder a chance. There must be something so empowering about having tons of people on your side. The way I see it, I have a lot of unpopular opinions. And I know that I don't want to be attacked if and when I share them. That tends to help me be a lot more patient with people that have different opinions from me. It's a lot easier to empathise when you imagine yourself being in the minority. And even if you happen to share the opinion of the majority, common decency does a lot more good than any words yelled.

When you give people grace, a healthy environment for understanding and growth can be created. Both parties can listen to each other and hash things out without making the other party feel inferior or stupid. Another thing is that you cannot force your opinions on anyone. So even if someone demeans the value of someones life or they believe in something that's completely stupid for you, you can't force them to change their views, how much more by attacking them. I think it's great that the world is becoming so much more aware of itself really. But I think that simple things like decency and giving people grace can go a long way to solving so many social issues that we have. I think self-reflection also plays a huge role. We need to be willing to question our beliefs. The fact that everyone believes it doesn't make it true. And the fact that no one believes it doesn't make it false. The truth is the truth even if noone believes it.

So, ask those questions. And when you're sure of what you believe and meet people who oppose that, breathe before you speak. And when you speak, speak with love. Despite their views, they're humans. And if you can't treat them with respect, they can't treat your words with any respect either. This isn't to say that just cause you're respectful you'll be respected. But you can rest assured that you opened up the door for civil conversation. It's not your responsibility to get the other person to walk through it.

Hope this helps.

God bless.

Dera.