Wait
Good evening ;)
I went on a walk today... alone... and stared at the sky for like 20 minutes. I've been meaning to go out alone for so long and I haven't been able to because I didn't know where anywhere was (still don't really know too much) and I was negotiating with my mum (she finally agreed that I can go alone if it's daylight). I don't necessary love being alone all the time, but there are some times I really do enjoy it. I've been seducted by the idea of going on a walk alone for a long time; partly because I don't want to have to ask somebody to accompany me, but also to have that alone time to think. Anyway, for everyone who has been wondering, it was nice. I was looking for a certain path that I had walked before, but ended up seating before I got there. Not cause I was tired (I know you already assumed that), but cause it had a nice view of the park, and I didn't want to walk so far down so that I wouldn't have to walk so far up ;) I get tired.. I'm human. So I sat for a bit and just stared at the sea. This is so weird especially cause it's the type of cheesy thing I would've laughed at before, but it's amazing how much I've loved the idea of looking at the sea. No noise, no distractions, no people (well.. not really, but no people I know if I go alone). Just me, the sea and God. To summarise, it's something I intend to do more.
The sea though is really interesting. It's cool how when you look far ahead, you can't see the ending of the sea, but it's not something that scares you. I wish I was more like that in life; not so worried or scared by uncertainty. But unfortunately, as humans, we have this untamed desire for control. Especially in the world we live in now. It's so hard to be comfortable and content with where we are or aren't when there's this idea of what success is and we all feel less than if we're not meeting it. I've been reading this book 'the Burnout Society', and it talks about how we live in an 'achievement' society where we define our worth by our achievements. It explains how this need to 'achieve', and 'succeed' by the world standards all while being ourselves is the reason why problems like depression are so common now. We think we're free... but we're slaves to our own ambition, only that to a large extent that ambition isn't even ours. It's the world's definition of success or freedom in our fields or lives. The problem with defining freedom universally and singularly is that our lives move at different paces. We're different people. And so if we try to identify whether we're succeeding or not based on what other people are doing or not doing, achieving or not achieving, we will always feel inadequate as we tend to only see the achievements other people have that we don't. Our society has also made us so impatient. We don't like having to wait for the things we want. If it's not an immediate solution, it's not a solution. If we can't get it tomorrow, we don't want it.
I've been listening to this song that's just talking about waiting, and it spoke to me in ways I didn't even know I needed to be spoken to. One of the lines said 'culture be trying to push me prematurely, but I'm gonna wait'. It's so true. Consciously or unconsciously, there are so many things our soicety would have us believe we need to get or do NOW or else we're missing out and we're behind. And even more, there are so many things we feel have to be done right now on our own terms. But if there's anything I've learnt, it's that we don't see the full picture. We don't know everything. So when we're doing everything we can to catch up to other people and what they have, we don't see the problems and pain we're running towards as well. We like to tell ourselves that we do and that the problems on that side must be better than on this side, but we don't really know. It's a risk. And if impatience is driving the risk, is it really worth taking? 'Wait on the Lord' the song says, 'He will renew your strength'. It can be so hard when everyone else seems to be moving full steam ahead. But you're different. Your purpose is different. Your journey will be different. What failed other people will not necessarily fail you and what worked for them may not work for you. What if the waiting season is meant to prepare and strenghten you for what comes next? Think about your life. What have you had to wait for? I was first in my class consistently in year 7, and then at some point I just wasn't. My position fluctuated for a long time... mainly stopping at second. I was still working hard and praying for first.. but I had kinda given up on it. I was tired of being disappointed. Then, I came first again during the last assessments in year 12. There were many people over the years who tried to diagnose what the problem was and tell me what I had to do to get back on track; what I had to give up and sacrifice. It was a long wait and I can't say I know why I had to wait that long, but I'm better off now because of it. I'm slower to say things are impossible and reluctant to compare myself and my journey with someone else's because I'm a living example. A long wait does not mean no or impossible. It means just that. Wait.
It's good to have ambitions, and dreams. Just make sure that their yours and not the world's. Because the world won't comfort you if you go into the wrong career, or if you have all the money, friends or followers in the world with no joy or peace. People will probably congratulate you for a painful period in your life just because all they could see was 'success'. Long story short, don't let the world tell you what your dreams should be or what you should be trying to achieve at a certain stage or age or level. And when you find your own dreams, wait on them. If they tarry, wait. There's a lot you can do in the waiting season. But rushing out of it prematurely will never guarantee your success; not on the world's terms, and maybe not even on yours.
God bless
Dera
I went on a walk today... alone... and stared at the sky for like 20 minutes. I've been meaning to go out alone for so long and I haven't been able to because I didn't know where anywhere was (still don't really know too much) and I was negotiating with my mum (she finally agreed that I can go alone if it's daylight). I don't necessary love being alone all the time, but there are some times I really do enjoy it. I've been seducted by the idea of going on a walk alone for a long time; partly because I don't want to have to ask somebody to accompany me, but also to have that alone time to think. Anyway, for everyone who has been wondering, it was nice. I was looking for a certain path that I had walked before, but ended up seating before I got there. Not cause I was tired (I know you already assumed that), but cause it had a nice view of the park, and I didn't want to walk so far down so that I wouldn't have to walk so far up ;) I get tired.. I'm human. So I sat for a bit and just stared at the sea. This is so weird especially cause it's the type of cheesy thing I would've laughed at before, but it's amazing how much I've loved the idea of looking at the sea. No noise, no distractions, no people (well.. not really, but no people I know if I go alone). Just me, the sea and God. To summarise, it's something I intend to do more.
The sea though is really interesting. It's cool how when you look far ahead, you can't see the ending of the sea, but it's not something that scares you. I wish I was more like that in life; not so worried or scared by uncertainty. But unfortunately, as humans, we have this untamed desire for control. Especially in the world we live in now. It's so hard to be comfortable and content with where we are or aren't when there's this idea of what success is and we all feel less than if we're not meeting it. I've been reading this book 'the Burnout Society', and it talks about how we live in an 'achievement' society where we define our worth by our achievements. It explains how this need to 'achieve', and 'succeed' by the world standards all while being ourselves is the reason why problems like depression are so common now. We think we're free... but we're slaves to our own ambition, only that to a large extent that ambition isn't even ours. It's the world's definition of success or freedom in our fields or lives. The problem with defining freedom universally and singularly is that our lives move at different paces. We're different people. And so if we try to identify whether we're succeeding or not based on what other people are doing or not doing, achieving or not achieving, we will always feel inadequate as we tend to only see the achievements other people have that we don't. Our society has also made us so impatient. We don't like having to wait for the things we want. If it's not an immediate solution, it's not a solution. If we can't get it tomorrow, we don't want it.
I've been listening to this song that's just talking about waiting, and it spoke to me in ways I didn't even know I needed to be spoken to. One of the lines said 'culture be trying to push me prematurely, but I'm gonna wait'. It's so true. Consciously or unconsciously, there are so many things our soicety would have us believe we need to get or do NOW or else we're missing out and we're behind. And even more, there are so many things we feel have to be done right now on our own terms. But if there's anything I've learnt, it's that we don't see the full picture. We don't know everything. So when we're doing everything we can to catch up to other people and what they have, we don't see the problems and pain we're running towards as well. We like to tell ourselves that we do and that the problems on that side must be better than on this side, but we don't really know. It's a risk. And if impatience is driving the risk, is it really worth taking? 'Wait on the Lord' the song says, 'He will renew your strength'. It can be so hard when everyone else seems to be moving full steam ahead. But you're different. Your purpose is different. Your journey will be different. What failed other people will not necessarily fail you and what worked for them may not work for you. What if the waiting season is meant to prepare and strenghten you for what comes next? Think about your life. What have you had to wait for? I was first in my class consistently in year 7, and then at some point I just wasn't. My position fluctuated for a long time... mainly stopping at second. I was still working hard and praying for first.. but I had kinda given up on it. I was tired of being disappointed. Then, I came first again during the last assessments in year 12. There were many people over the years who tried to diagnose what the problem was and tell me what I had to do to get back on track; what I had to give up and sacrifice. It was a long wait and I can't say I know why I had to wait that long, but I'm better off now because of it. I'm slower to say things are impossible and reluctant to compare myself and my journey with someone else's because I'm a living example. A long wait does not mean no or impossible. It means just that. Wait.
It's good to have ambitions, and dreams. Just make sure that their yours and not the world's. Because the world won't comfort you if you go into the wrong career, or if you have all the money, friends or followers in the world with no joy or peace. People will probably congratulate you for a painful period in your life just because all they could see was 'success'. Long story short, don't let the world tell you what your dreams should be or what you should be trying to achieve at a certain stage or age or level. And when you find your own dreams, wait on them. If they tarry, wait. There's a lot you can do in the waiting season. But rushing out of it prematurely will never guarantee your success; not on the world's terms, and maybe not even on yours.
God bless
Dera
really liked this one :)
ReplyDelete-nazish
great one! -Neto
ReplyDeleteThank you ;)
Delete