Categorizing....
Hello everyone,
Yesterday started off very calm and ended up being swamped with work. I hope this belated post is enjoyable😉
On this same Saturday, I went on a walk with my friend and she was telling me about these Robert Sapolski lectures she’d been watching about how we try to categorise things to make things easier on ourselves. I wasn’t really getting the full gist at the time, but later that night we were finishing ‘Shadow and Bone’ ( just in case you don’t know it, all you need to know is that Grisha and Grisha hunters don’t get along) and one of the lady’s friends came to ‘save’ her from this Grisha Hunter. Only problem was that she didn’t need to be saved; she and the Grisha Hunter had found common ground (and yes, fallen in love🙄😂). But her friend could not fathom the idea that the Grisha Hunter could’ve changed. He said and I quote "they don't change." I rememeber pausing the show, looking at my friend and saying that I never wanted to hate a group of people so much that I would be unable to fathom the idea that they could have reasonable views or could change. My friend smiled and was legitimately screaming as she repeated what she'd been telling me earlier - 'we underestimate the similarities between items in separate categories and overestimate the similarities between items in the same category'. The Grisha hunters systematically hunted Grisha (obvious much) and killed them and so I can understand why friendships between the two groups were not common. But at the same time, I never want to get to a place where I am unable to process that people might not identify with everything their category is known for, or where I am unable to give people from different categories a chance because my bias and stereotype of them is too strong for me to see the human behind the category. There are definitely people who may be model representatives of the categories they belong to. But there are people who could have been born into certain categories and who identified with certain categories for a long time, but don't agree with everything in those categories. I, for example, am Nigerian. But I don't agree with everything Nigerians do, or do everything the world thinks Nigerians do. I'm Nigerian, but I'm also Chidera and as a result of the complexity that comes with being a human being, you can't put me or anyone else into one single category. And it's a lot worse when you try to do that without ever giving the person a chance to show you that there's more to them than the category you associate them with. Just saying... maybe we need to talk more and assume less.
Beyond that, I was super busy this entire weekend and am interested to see how this new week goes. I recently got a major leadership position which means a lot for a lot of reasons. Beyond the fact that I might be the first Nigerian to hold this position, I don't think a lot of overseas or black students (or maybe any??) have held this position in the past either, which makes it that much more valuable. Having said that, I can see the work ahead and like all other things in life, I'm trying to organise more and stress less. Easier said than done (I know), but I have seen organisation save me so much time and stress and I can't go back to how I used to be.
From me to you, happy Mothers day and happy Sunday. Have the bestest week possible!
God bless.
Dera
Yesterday started off very calm and ended up being swamped with work. I hope this belated post is enjoyable😉
On this same Saturday, I went on a walk with my friend and she was telling me about these Robert Sapolski lectures she’d been watching about how we try to categorise things to make things easier on ourselves. I wasn’t really getting the full gist at the time, but later that night we were finishing ‘Shadow and Bone’ ( just in case you don’t know it, all you need to know is that Grisha and Grisha hunters don’t get along) and one of the lady’s friends came to ‘save’ her from this Grisha Hunter. Only problem was that she didn’t need to be saved; she and the Grisha Hunter had found common ground (and yes, fallen in love🙄😂). But her friend could not fathom the idea that the Grisha Hunter could’ve changed. He said and I quote "they don't change." I rememeber pausing the show, looking at my friend and saying that I never wanted to hate a group of people so much that I would be unable to fathom the idea that they could have reasonable views or could change. My friend smiled and was legitimately screaming as she repeated what she'd been telling me earlier - 'we underestimate the similarities between items in separate categories and overestimate the similarities between items in the same category'. The Grisha hunters systematically hunted Grisha (obvious much) and killed them and so I can understand why friendships between the two groups were not common. But at the same time, I never want to get to a place where I am unable to process that people might not identify with everything their category is known for, or where I am unable to give people from different categories a chance because my bias and stereotype of them is too strong for me to see the human behind the category. There are definitely people who may be model representatives of the categories they belong to. But there are people who could have been born into certain categories and who identified with certain categories for a long time, but don't agree with everything in those categories. I, for example, am Nigerian. But I don't agree with everything Nigerians do, or do everything the world thinks Nigerians do. I'm Nigerian, but I'm also Chidera and as a result of the complexity that comes with being a human being, you can't put me or anyone else into one single category. And it's a lot worse when you try to do that without ever giving the person a chance to show you that there's more to them than the category you associate them with. Just saying... maybe we need to talk more and assume less.
Beyond that, I was super busy this entire weekend and am interested to see how this new week goes. I recently got a major leadership position which means a lot for a lot of reasons. Beyond the fact that I might be the first Nigerian to hold this position, I don't think a lot of overseas or black students (or maybe any??) have held this position in the past either, which makes it that much more valuable. Having said that, I can see the work ahead and like all other things in life, I'm trying to organise more and stress less. Easier said than done (I know), but I have seen organisation save me so much time and stress and I can't go back to how I used to be.
From me to you, happy Mothers day and happy Sunday. Have the bestest week possible!
God bless.
Dera
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