For seasons not forever
Hey!
I am that person who cries at all the sad movies and gets emotionally invested in shows and books. I recently finished watching season 2 of High school musical the musical the series and…. Wow. That’s really all I can say. The music was a step up from the first season (yes, this has become a review) and maybe more impactful because the main couple didn’t have a happy ending together. They broke up and I expected them to have enough time to reconcile before the end of the season and that didn’t happen. I think what pains me the most is that I legitimately don’t think they’re going to get back together… not with the way it seems the storyline is headed. I get why they had to break up. The girl was learning to be her own person (which is necessary) and the guy was being clingy and disrespectful in a couple of ways. I think what just breaks my heart about it was that the guy was going through a really tough time… his parents were separating and he didn’t really want any other thing to be changing, especially not with his girlfriend. I think he still intended to try getting her back… but he was over at his mum’s for spring break and she told him that maybe the last best thing he could do for someone he truly loved would be to let them go. He proceeded to write a song talking about their love story and letting her go… a very heartbreaking song (I’m very surprised I didn’t cry… was probably to occupied with the good singing).
I finished the series at about 2am this morning and have been listening to the song on repeat since I woke up. It struck me as so sad last night but so intoxicating. The lyrics were so honest you know? But as I’ve been listening to it more recently… I’ve felt a bit happier. Letting go of something or someone you’ve loved and wanted for a long time or that you’ve tried to protect and maintain for a long time can be so hard. This guy was trying so hard to stop things from changing… that he was changing. His girlfriend was becoming more of herself and in his effort to preserve their relationship, he started suffocating her basically. I think we’re like that a lot. We’re so scared of change and of losing what we have right now… so we hang on to it so tight and lose it anyway. Especially with people. It’s hard to have someone you care about becoming interested in new things or picking up interests that are different from what connected you in the first place. I know firsthand that it can be so scary to feel like your friends or partners are becoming different people and that you might lose them. The mistake we make is that we then try to tie them down to everything that used to be… becoming so rigid and unwilling to accept or support their growth. And that’s what makes us lose them. But there’s a certain freedom or relief that comes when you accept that right now, you guys might just not have enough space for each other. That sounds weird and sad and maybe even rude. But I think it’s true. The way the song was written was as though the boyfriend was giving a nod to their time together while saying goodbye. He was clearly upset about it, but I think it’s also so freeing to appreciate what you had with someone while recognising that you guys don’t have it anymore. It’s hard to get to that place of acceptance and it’s even harder to get used to it, but it’s worth it, don’t you think?
I’m grateful because even though I found it hard to leave some friendships and found it very hard to communicate why I had to leave, I can look back now and recognise my reasons for leaving and I can appreciate the courage it took. This couple had grown up together and with everything that was happening with his family, I do think it’s important that the boyfriend gets to understand how to live independently of this girl. It’s sad… and not a conventional happy ending. But we can’t give our all to our friendships and relationships if we’re only half of ourselves. Some relationships might be there to help us through those growing seasons, and some might be hindrances to the growth. I can’t really give step by step tips on how to recognise the difference between the two or how to recognise the difference between growth and pushing people away, cause that can be another thin line to tread on. But I do know that as we grow and move to different stages of life, as we explore new interests and find out more about ourselves, certain people may stop being supportive or we may no longer have room in our lives for certain people. In the worst case scenario, our friends might start to actively oppose our growth. Communication is a great first step, but ultimately, some relationships are meant for seasons not forever.
P.S Please let me know if you have any good movie or show suggestions. I think I'm way too invested in this show. After finishing it, I was trying to get the whole thing off my mind. I was going to pray for them.. but then I remembered they aren't actually real (insert face slapping emoji here).
God bless.
Dera
I am that person who cries at all the sad movies and gets emotionally invested in shows and books. I recently finished watching season 2 of High school musical the musical the series and…. Wow. That’s really all I can say. The music was a step up from the first season (yes, this has become a review) and maybe more impactful because the main couple didn’t have a happy ending together. They broke up and I expected them to have enough time to reconcile before the end of the season and that didn’t happen. I think what pains me the most is that I legitimately don’t think they’re going to get back together… not with the way it seems the storyline is headed. I get why they had to break up. The girl was learning to be her own person (which is necessary) and the guy was being clingy and disrespectful in a couple of ways. I think what just breaks my heart about it was that the guy was going through a really tough time… his parents were separating and he didn’t really want any other thing to be changing, especially not with his girlfriend. I think he still intended to try getting her back… but he was over at his mum’s for spring break and she told him that maybe the last best thing he could do for someone he truly loved would be to let them go. He proceeded to write a song talking about their love story and letting her go… a very heartbreaking song (I’m very surprised I didn’t cry… was probably to occupied with the good singing).
I finished the series at about 2am this morning and have been listening to the song on repeat since I woke up. It struck me as so sad last night but so intoxicating. The lyrics were so honest you know? But as I’ve been listening to it more recently… I’ve felt a bit happier. Letting go of something or someone you’ve loved and wanted for a long time or that you’ve tried to protect and maintain for a long time can be so hard. This guy was trying so hard to stop things from changing… that he was changing. His girlfriend was becoming more of herself and in his effort to preserve their relationship, he started suffocating her basically. I think we’re like that a lot. We’re so scared of change and of losing what we have right now… so we hang on to it so tight and lose it anyway. Especially with people. It’s hard to have someone you care about becoming interested in new things or picking up interests that are different from what connected you in the first place. I know firsthand that it can be so scary to feel like your friends or partners are becoming different people and that you might lose them. The mistake we make is that we then try to tie them down to everything that used to be… becoming so rigid and unwilling to accept or support their growth. And that’s what makes us lose them. But there’s a certain freedom or relief that comes when you accept that right now, you guys might just not have enough space for each other. That sounds weird and sad and maybe even rude. But I think it’s true. The way the song was written was as though the boyfriend was giving a nod to their time together while saying goodbye. He was clearly upset about it, but I think it’s also so freeing to appreciate what you had with someone while recognising that you guys don’t have it anymore. It’s hard to get to that place of acceptance and it’s even harder to get used to it, but it’s worth it, don’t you think?
I’m grateful because even though I found it hard to leave some friendships and found it very hard to communicate why I had to leave, I can look back now and recognise my reasons for leaving and I can appreciate the courage it took. This couple had grown up together and with everything that was happening with his family, I do think it’s important that the boyfriend gets to understand how to live independently of this girl. It’s sad… and not a conventional happy ending. But we can’t give our all to our friendships and relationships if we’re only half of ourselves. Some relationships might be there to help us through those growing seasons, and some might be hindrances to the growth. I can’t really give step by step tips on how to recognise the difference between the two or how to recognise the difference between growth and pushing people away, cause that can be another thin line to tread on. But I do know that as we grow and move to different stages of life, as we explore new interests and find out more about ourselves, certain people may stop being supportive or we may no longer have room in our lives for certain people. In the worst case scenario, our friends might start to actively oppose our growth. Communication is a great first step, but ultimately, some relationships are meant for seasons not forever.
P.S Please let me know if you have any good movie or show suggestions. I think I'm way too invested in this show. After finishing it, I was trying to get the whole thing off my mind. I was going to pray for them.. but then I remembered they aren't actually real (insert face slapping emoji here).
God bless.
Dera
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