Second term!

Hello everyone,

How has your first week post-lockdown been? (if you are in the UK I mean) Mine was pretty peachy. I got to see friends I haven't seen in a while, start some pretty fun projects and have physical classes again. I know not everyone can relate, but I personally loved being in class again. It reminded me why I love some subjects, and made some (insert suitable adjective here) subjects a lot more enjoyable. I was pretty tired during every first period, but I really love being back in school... guess I'm just that type of person.

Also, I am really excited to go back home over Easter. I haven't been away for sooo long, but I'm just really excited. I also must say, in this last week, I have felt so much peace. I'm just not as stressed about everything... and that's not to say that there haven't been stessful things. But with loads of practice and failure, I think I'm finally getting to the not-letting-stressful-things-stress-me part.


After my first term at a school in the UK, people at home asked how it was and someone in particular asked if I had had culture shock. I said no and that was true at the time. I feel like a lot of the issues that I was 'meant' to have dealt with in the first term only really hit me in the first half of my second term. From friendships and academics to university scares and extracurriculars. I faced these kind of issues in the first term but I don't think that I faced them to the extent that I've faced them this term. It's been a huge growing season, and I'm probably not done yet. Beyond the mental and emotional stuff, the weather really shifted this term to the snowy, rainy weather the UK is so well known for, contributing to the things that have made this term so different. But I'm grateful. It's made be learn a lot about courage and confidence; doing things even when I'm scared, especially when that fear is rooted in what other people will say, think or do. I can't say that that fear has completely diminshed, but I do think it has a lot less influence on what I do now. Things might be awkward, weird and hard. But if I don't do what I really love or think is right or take those chances just to preserve relationships, I don't know if those relationships are worth preserving.

The IB has come with a lot of work and sacrifices. But I've decided that there are some things that I don't want to sacrifice. And some things I still want to learn. So yeah... I'm becoming a lot more skilled in the art of navigating the awkward. But I truly believe that's a life skill. And that sometime in the future when doing what God has convicted me of comes without any fear about how people will act, I will thank myself and be even more grateful for all the intentional awkwardness I may suffer now. If you can relate to this, know that you're not alone. Don't base your life on other people's assumptions of you because those will change. You don't want to constantly be adapting to fit in with other people's ideas of who you are or should be. You are growing and changing and learning. Give yourself the opportunity to do that without adding other people's definitions of you to the mix.

I hope this makes a sliver of sense and that y'all have a good week :) and Mother's day (if you celebrate the one tomorrow).

God bless.
Dera

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