Dera's Diary

Hello, Hard to believe we've almost finished September. That might be a slight exaggeration on my part, but we've definitely gotten somewhere. This month, especially this week, I've been learning that the road to make friends is a two-way street. For so long I've been focused on making sure that I wasn't gaining my peace or comfort from being around other people. I worked so hard to make sure that I was comfortable being on my own that I forgot that I play a part in the process of making friends. I haven't gotten to the other side of this bridge yet, I'm still walking pretty slowly. But I'm learning to get out of my comfort zone a little, be the first one to say hi, make conversation and join conversations. Nothing worthwhile is built by staying in your comfort zone. I'm learning and thought I could encourage you to learn this too. My relationship with relationships has been a long one and I'm still learning. I thought I'd have learnt eve...

I'm growing up and I can't say it's all fun. I've been rewatching some old childhood shows and have been noticing subtle racist and sexist undertones. In an episode of Victorious, Robbie's puppet said 'he called you fro cause your hair's all silly'. A little while ago, this statement may have meant nothing to me. But I'm growing up and I'm realising how the world has normalised dissing and putting down black attributes, features and people. A lot of black people have 'fros' and I can assure you that there is nothing silly about your hair being able to defy the laws of gravity! Also, I have no idea why women are trained to be mothers and wives. A woman, just like anyone else, is a human being. The totality of her life and who she is cannot be summed up to being a wife or a mother. Both roles are incredibly important and valuable, but we should focus on raising our children to be good human beings. Not to be good in a particular role we...

Hello there! September is a pretty special month. Not only is it so close to the end of the year, it's also a month that signifies new beginnings. I feel this way particularly because the new school year starts in September. This year is incredibly different. Some schools aren't resuming this September. Some are, but are resuming in a very different way. Some schools still don't know when they are going to resume. So much uncertainty and some times certainty that just isn't what you wanted. 2020 has been full of both of these things for me. Don't get me wrong, I've probably seen more miracles this year than in my entire life. But at the same time, I've experienced some of the greatest disappointment and emotional exhaustion. I would like to think of myself as someone that's seen the other side of all these things.It doesn't mean I don't still make some visits to those tired, disappointed places, but I've been on the other side. I see this q...

Hey everyone, I know this post is super late and everyone has already moved on from this week looking towards the next. We're gonna enter September this week. That's major. The ninth month of the year and the beginning of the school year for a huge majority of us.If there's anyhting I've learnt this week, it's that disappointments are real. God isn't doing stuff the way I thought He would and that's discouraging. But what I've also learnt is that it's better to be confident than certain. Instead of trying to determine and construct how God is going to do it, I choose to be confident in the fact that He will do it because of who He is. It's not easy, but it's sustainable. Stay safe guys. God bless. Dera

 Hello world. I'm posting a bit later than usual this week. It's a Friday; end of the week, beginning of the week-end. Almost my favourite part of the week. I have to be honest... This quarantine period has been... enlightening to say the least. I say it as though it's ending because God-willing it is ending for me. I've learnt so much about myself and my family. I picked up some new skills which I'm grateful for. I got to know God a bit better and establish intentional time for Him everyday. I discovered the need to empathise with people and intentionally check up on them. Doesn't matter if they're halfway across the world or right next to you. If you love someone, you should be intentional about loving them and caring for them. See how I'm using that word "intentional" a lot. I'm beginning to understand it's importance. I felt a really deep conviction to love people more intentionally this quarantine. And cause the world isn't fai...

It's crazy, you know. A year ago at this time of the year, everyone would be in full gear preparing to return to school. And in a way, everyone is still preparing, just that now you have to take into account quarantine periods, and masks, and sanitisers and the likes.  I mean it's necessary to take these things into account; this might be our new normal for a while. But I'd be lying if I said all the sanitary procedures weren't exhausting and the thought of no physical contact wasn't saddening. Not that I'm such a touchy-touchy person, but just knowing you can't do something makes you kinda eager to do it. But in this case, that thing you can't do might make the difference between who lives and dies. It sounds pretty dramatic, but the truth is the truth even when it's crazy. Just wanted to encourage y'all. If you're like me and you're worried by how little physical contact might affect your social life especially in a new place (it's ...

Happy August everyone. I can't believe the year has run away so fast. I spoke about perfection in a post about two weeks ago and I can honestly tell you that it hasn't gotten easier. But I really do think diagnosing the problem is like solving half of it.  I've taken up journalling. I've heard from a lot of people (like on the internet:)) that it really helps. It's useful to process what you'r'e feeling as you're feeling it. Journalling provides that opportunity. On that note, I am going to dab into mental health. As I'm writing this I haven't done half as much research as I should have and so I will not be talking from a professional point of view. I can only say what I know.  I think every day, especially at the beginning of your day, it's important to understand where your head is at.  Take some time to really process how you're feeling, on your own, away from the noise and crowd. Examine your emotions and really make sure you're o...